this is my arm bending the wrong way
these are words my brain makes when it

FUCK REAL LIFE

i'm gonna ride my bike to wal-mart

i'm not gonna go to the party

w/ all my friends 

bc i am sad

& when i am sad

i do stupid shit

IMMA GO GET HUNG



come home over bitter boulder
build me tower on top of tower
look down at clouds
beat my wings against my my my
taste is sky
watch my flying wag-it wash the blue
off your face
name any month to seem different
from where we are at now
or now
or now or now
reply to the mirror
abt how beautiful i always was
say fuck you mirror
say i still love you
for whatever reason
unmorphed season melting my weakness
ate my chest pain
direct the blood to my thought or void
or talk to me w/ yr teeter-teeth
chit chat abt the good ol' miss yous
back before i died an awful life
& lied abt the luck it took
to get over the mts.
asking to hold smoke
when you see yr breath
& i can't word hard enough
to say i am numbing
& neck is ready
to be pretty
so kiss the hell out of my magical
i am stretching
a million miles up the clavicle
i am a dumb guy
i am a wet dog
shaking dry in the living room
i forget
that nothing is forever
i mean at some point
there will be nothing
or no nothing
& so on
& i was listening to Brick
by the Ben Fold's Five
& it reminded me
of the yellow duplex
my family lived in
behind a KFC
& how we had to get rid
of our cat Sampson
& how i named him
after my favorite story character
who i never thought i could be like
because i was so small
but i guess i am
pretty similar now
& shortly after that i
started writing
abt how angry i was
w/ my life
that was 1993
that was when i first felt alone
when i was around people

FUCK SPECTRUMS



i am a dumb salty mouth
i can't talk the way i'd like to be singing in yr ears
i am a ditch
i think my poems are stupid

GOOGLE POEM

1.

i am afraid i can't vomit you out of my stomach

i am afraid you can't see me through the window
of the sushi restaurant

no i am afraid you can

i am afraid i am not a brick
or i am one but
there is no one here to throw me

i am afraid i have lost all of my blood
& replaced it w/ you

i am afraid someone will read this poem
& say
i wonder
who he is talking abt, i wonder
if he will say her name

so if you google her name
this poem will come up

2.

i googled
how long it would take to spend a trillion dollars
i looked up
how much it would cost to fly to NYC tonight
be there by 8 or 8:30
it was over twice what i had in my bank
i would have taken
a loan
from a loan shark

DIE HARD OR DIE HARD



god damn i want to crush bricks w/ my solar energy 
look at me glow from behind the moonsmile
look at me licking a roller coaster track
i don't think fear tastes sweet
but i can't control what my tongue is thinking
sometimes i slip on ice
sometimes i want to eat marshmallows
& talk sloppy
write goopy poems
do they have good air where you breathe?
how can i describe melting?
or i puff up into a billion bubbles
god damn i want to hug you again
there is no ooze inside my scatter spots
dripping up into space
FUCK IT
i like making messes
i like when you grab me by the beard
dragging my face where you want my lips to be
everything is meaningless
i was shot up by sunny mushroom smoke to rock bottom
watch me as i go slow to summit
& plummet towards standing ants w/ no reason
in their actions but to keep
doing it
worship me the way you miss the smell of ocean
when you are stuck in the sky
& my stomping clod knockers
tracking mud around on the perfect carpet
of the perfect house
made out of perfect wood
or spell my name D.E.A.D.T.R.E.E.
on my gutsy trunk w/ a silly shape around it
named for its' juicy usefulness & power over
my mind. how has hell & debt been a worry of my rivering spine
my naked rain warmth
i want to dynamite every part of my sparkling
feel the bone plates shift in & out of molten me
making a new more mountainous me
where did my sores go
are they in these ears whispery
dipping their honey hands into my broosed brain?
what's goose?
what do you want from my body
this evening? i am dry
from too much of-a nothing
i am leaking empty from my holy polk-a-dotty body
i am not a lot of want
just an excited fresh young gun
hoping to experience the best things
the toxic things
the dreams of slime & running water
w/ their endless jobs of doing the same slobber
until they bust apart or are a part
taste my day as a star
i want to shoot lasers out of my eyes
there is so much inside of my skull
why am i exploding?
there has got to be a better way to save the world

DIE HARD OR DIE HARD

DIE HARD OR DIE HARD



where did my sores go
are they in these ears whispery
dipping their honey hands into my broosed brain?
what's goose?
what do you want from my body
this evening? i am dry
from too much of-a nothing
i am leaking empty from my holy polk-a-dotty body



shake my neck so the fruitbirds fall from my faceleaf
i am a crackity crick crooked from too much looking

BRAIN POEM


hi
(looks
at
yr
shoes) through lake fog
are they skipping
anything?
does this lip touch w/ my goldeagle maw
fly away ontop of rocks i stack
don't glide yr feather in my knees
i doubt
the sun's heat
i look at words on the ironwall & forget my own name
what i mean
a crowd
you are around
i like to ghost at the floating
move past metals
there i am
againing
i was writing down poems to remember me by
bye bye
you look good
making those continents bounce
juggle melty ice cubes in yr cheeks
take one home to yr cat & his cat & the alley 
put sugar in yr mouthtank
gurgle
i like feeling
& numb
i grow  potatoes in my throatcave
damn me
what can i find w/ eyes
in my bullshittery
my nose bleeds woodchips
onto my father's unfinished garden
he grows
whispers & peppers
& a leather belt

OLD MONEY


why am i alive
shifting wealth underground to sky
how rich is my skin or my brain or my teeth
my thinking
is just another part of the soil
feel the rock grow inside my kidney lust
dark circles on hip & my raccooned mask
why am i not a mountain
w/ icy streams mazed down my face
bring fire & i am a pleasant farmer
friend to talk the leaves off
drove straight into the painted tunnel
flattened my face
it is strange that i adore you

WORLDS


borne backs of armored
bucking that populates
a forest near an ovaling
my talk & look & antler guard
i cannot keep alive in gifted voice
i say the grass is taller than i was
the moss clings to a bark of mine
chewed through layered cover
a charging sharp & something
i mean the garden is fenced in
but the gate is open for
critters go & go as they they
first to nip away
sweet melon & bell pepper
i am lost as an eater
i grow larger as i wither

BANGS

i can't say
any
push sea
i am to explode
i go moon
into everywhere
would come
back aday
from gates 
of the end
to be 
blown up again
& just one
time in yr
hands

MARTIN LAWRENCE



i am made by suits & i burnt my tongue on Wendy's chili
i am not in love w/ the construction of my self
but i like to imagine i am a-building
i have dynamite in my beard
a stick of dynamite just went off it blew away most of my thought process
i feel bald
i feel atomic bomby being ejaculated from molten earth
on december 10th during the last year of the first Obama administration
it was cold
& i didn't light my self on fire to play baseball
but i did eat Wendy's chili & read the lyrics to "caress me down" by Sublime
i have half a blown-off rockface
i am bouldered
my chiseled brickgrin biting through the nothing
or clay
i have mud under my nails
i am not on fire again still dowsed in gasoline
god damn i love
like a dumb puppy
chug the ocean w/ my eyes bubbling
if you ask
why i am storing all life supplies in my beard
i am leaving
or just a fair warning
if i leave i will keep all the things i need in my beard
it is a good idea
to not need so many things
you couldn't walk outside
& laugh at your eventual death
w/ out a ton of dumbshit falling to the ground
i am crying & cutting onions from the planet
i have always slimed on
i have lived on this planet w/ ghostface killah
but we have never met
i saw wu-tang in Chicago but he wasn't there
it made me kind of not care
abt what is in my beard
or i have one made up of several smaller human faces
like O.D.B.'s face stretched out over time
& loss
& remember to floss your pruney brain
i still have dynamite strapped on to my insane
chase me off chain me to a spaceship
it's blasting
it's fancy the way i walk
or shrug off the gold pieces of my jolly skull
pumping lava lard in my tubes
keeps my heart nice & oily
blink incessantly out of confusion
as the sun burns from inside my eyeballs
i just imagined what it would look like to earthlings
if i was crying on the sun
or some other bigger more beautiful star
ugly star
i am spitting assloads of hot cocoa onto frozen tundra
cowabunga cowabunga cowabunga
i don't have time for eyes
& the reverse is also true
which is liquid which is ice
which is everything
& i am shouting
at void
full of billions of things i don't need
i am a blur of sound
WOO HOO
i am all teared up
abt how easy or not easy or shit
my head was wrecked
WOO HOO
but it is only my problem if i believe
the problem exists
it is a mumbo jumbo
it never is 
WOO HOO
& if it is
WOO HOO
& i asked hollywood executives if i could be made
into a BAD BOY & they did it
& it was ok
& then the hollywood executives asked me
if i wanted to be a BAD BOY II
& i said yes
i am american
i burned my mouth on fastfood chili
because it is winter
& i am doing the things a life is supposed to have
done in it
like i am breaking my back
trying to make you believe in me
i am a funny man
this is my poem for you
& it is me
& i hope i am worth something
but fuck that man i mean fuck these suits
fuck the sun
society is a fuckn joke
i want to set all comedy on fire
& laugh smoke in & out of my lungs
like i am some kinda porno
made for morons who never even
saw a good movie
& i have popcorn in my teeth
everywhere my grinning is city pigeons
that don't have time for the trash
there isn't enough trash in the world
to build the trash mtn i have always wanted
i am stoned
so oblivious to the buried
my skelly crunches easily under earth
& i go ground water skinny dipping
below the skin of a doomed place
even if i was immortal the sun would still kill me
even if it didn't want to
i think it is so messed up that i have to die
& i want to laugh about that & write poetry until i stop existing
i mean i just bust
bust seams from my suit made suit
bust out of a name & a place & all the nouns in my blood
i have silly things in my mind i have them
& i am a lazy comet
i have star stuff in my beard
& i am laughing at the galaxy that wants me back
& the back that i am breaking
or a new perfect back
that can carry the weight of my thinking
slowly letting it drip down the drain of what i am saying
what the hell am i saying
what is the point to all this wonder
meandering on a pebble
floating in black water
w/ infinity growing from my face
i have time in my beard
or i have put it there
where i found it snoozing
& i will leave it alone
& i will forget it's name but sing songs of it still
& i will eat my beard
& time
& all of you
i am the sun
i am sorry there is no stopping me now

YOU ON THE PHONE AT A MADE UP TRAIN STATION


i am rocketships
saw you
i was a dreambean
i was on brain away
skip-it onto cloud cover
the winter hangs
i am nude today
you standing
where i say
as i come running
it is just a distance
the way it takes
lightyears
for some things to happen

MOON HOAX



what if i was real
or i imagine
or i write abt paul or dead paul
or paul's dead brother
idk where the next
horse bloats
she is pullin a lotta nothin
tug tightrope around waist
tuck yr tongue into your pants
i guess that

my brain hurts
i am thinking maybe the moon landing isn't real
or paul mccartney is dead
& john knew & george knew & ringo is
my brain hurts & i watched too much x-files
or i watched the right number of 'em
& idk jack abt who shot J.R.
but i know he died this year for real
i mean for real
i wrote a poem about J.R.

I AM QUEENS BLVD




you feel like crap
like how shit is
difficult
to smell like roses
or something else about getting smashed
in the brain
by a big fuckin motorvehicle
i can't put my finger on it
that's digusting
that's a cannonball of universe stones
skip at sky
fire in yr pants
you or yr god or the ocean is a liar
i am made of water
or 100% stars
or my mind is shit is mush
is me snorting
prescriptomusclemoo
relax man
i am the stacks of cans of recycle
the moon man
the vitamin man
i gotta jet or i gotta airplane license
across the ocean
i am a sea swing
shake the scales off my collison face
singy shark bite marks around the neck
who is poking my underhood
the heel dents on my sp ce door
she kicks me
off the cliff
of the sun
i mean i am on fire
or i am the dotted line to sign
for a billion buckaroos
shucking shellfish
thinking about your lovely face
hidden in the middle of the world

SWINE

time waited by infinity
to bring this jagged sooncorpse
to be a sunshine for now
my ways away end is a smiling croca
doctor please pull me from the darkness
i shake bits of nowhere from fear
of who i will always be
i am a shot horse head
i am the unmendable broken leg
i am advanced science
i am immortal
i am burn slow
yr so show me darling wave light
turn on my temperature
the elements of my bath eyes
squash the peg from yr neck
i too was a bad & good as distance allows me
for child or my parent breaks past
to crumble under the weight of zero
i speak in sports or ways to make my man
be more like a decent human 
she knows me 
or yr baby grows too
i am & always will be fluid or months weather
before it is supposed to be warm forever
the sky on the moon goes to the same heaven
i mean to always a friend i can be
no matter who fathers
no matter what comes from our bodies
or who calls past a home
but fear of what is ahead
are you scared of living
are you the dawn before i wished summer to stop
creeping towards the cold alone existence
i have found
i dont know
but i am here
& then i will be there
i am small
until i become everything

I HAVE A BEARD

i have a beard

i am made of bricks

& deathrays

but my beard is just a normal human beard

maybe longer than some

maybe fuller

i am a field of dead grass

a beard

wheatfield or lion or

i have a beard

today

i am alive

i hope

there is something good

TWRAPPO

potato
potato
laguna
iguana
topanga
zoomba
pumba
oof
you're like
doe he?
i microwave
it's small vibrating
bzzzz
or i do again
or i glue my fingers together
i fix my teeth
i am a dentist
i am a fence
sitting
twitching
a mile is
nothing
in outter space
i say
i am drunk a lot
but i
don't have it in me
i just want you
to know
how young
i am
to the mountains
i mean we compare
ourselves
to immortals
the idea
of not dying
it's fruit
it's food
it's shit
it's dirt
it's sprout
it's tree
it's fruit
i am going to be going
i am just circles
made of curved perfect
or just was
just is

TAKE OFF YR HEAD

hey lady
where are you going w/ my head
w/ w/ my skully
hey spit gobs of split atoms or dirt
or piss tank 
i am against all odds
or oddballs or basketballs
or i've got big muscles
lots of meat 
it's against the rules
i am down today
i am down w fire
hey paul
i am on fire
sound alarm
ask for yarn
this is just rachaels pussy poem
this is just a choo choo chug
a flaming flamingo
you're only allowed to burn
in the winter
this is to prevent fuel
or the thousand year old bridge
i have sworn to protect
no not slash & burn
now blazed earth now blazed justin
kicking down the strong glass
pipe house that paul built
his brothers house
his dads brothers house
& so on as that is pauls family tree poem
my dad's little brother killed himself
i mean he was maybe 40 something
i saw my uncle Rick a fee weeks bef
i waved at him
i always thought he was very sad
not like ha ha sad idk
Mr. Steinbrook my plains history teacher
in high school always thought i was high
he asked me if i was Ricks son bc i looked
just like him
& i kind of did
he had a beard 
there were no toothpicks in it
i wonder who threw his head
i wonder what happened to his heart
i mean there were no toothpicks in his beard

NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA



ich bin ein buuuuh
lean
over my braincliff
speak
french
leak
so much
look lazy
get puffy
i am feeling gross in my brain
i would like to remove my brain
& start over w/ a new brain
no no no no
& songs
i hear
& words abt words caring abt words
where words come from
why did you spell words wrong
W-R-O-N-G-S
my dick is average
my brain is slack
my chest is coughy la la
update my shit
on a file
flick
it
taste schtick
read my texts right now
my skull cries
skullabies
skullaparabullabies
fruit pies
i love healthy pastry
i am having a baby
i am having an abortion
i know
everything about the world inside my thought bubble
it says HMMMMMM
i wander
ich bin ein wunder
slueth

TAME


hanging or what is the cliff
meaning is my happy
a rainbow i say sun or who rains me
& change light from see to distant chime
growth in a feeling a universe
the magic that makes me dance
i am a liver or move a stormy beach
the crush of relaxed air
small shakes & situations of yr voice
calling me the patient star death
or beautiful gnarl trunk & root & olive
i am squeeze me w all yr strength
i am a smoke a trail to the gold mountains
i can't live here w you i assume
afraid of disappearing
of being the smallest sound

HEAT



melt me lala magma she
doesn't does wall know a way
to oh yay oh hi i read
forget & beneath my brain
i mmm gooey too
see tootsie tushy gush geyser
she slices yr
tell me a watch witch swinging
oh there oh pretend it isn't
now just not frozen
i liquid between ocean &
underseamountains
surprising
i am unlovable i am unmagical
a dripping drizzy gloom doom
black in my mouth or in my air cans
i am afraid of how it will be
& moths
or i am planning to be the strangest
doo doo brain
bird butt bubble arms & torso
connection of that is ore
we're making a sword
hammer form some kinda bomb
that you lust into being
out of a barroom of wolfish me's
i am sweaty too
sun
i am crying bc i am woozy
bc i looked at the eclipse in 4th grade
bc there is too much
hot sauce
in my mouth

SPOILER ALERT



you don't die
i am flying
the ground is small & tiniest thinging
you song
saw buzzing down tree
trunks off or up into sky for spry
down the crag jagged
tooth chew chomp squash
a gnat a tadpole a workshop in the arctic
i'm a real boy a toy a joke
a broke tug lug shrug
don't know where i put it
ah ha
the edge of the end of the crust
where water is going
to be water
i cry at the end
i never die until after
before the bomb
will will us to speak
the mountains are moving
the flat earth
will soon be tall
i guess a god is enough
or i glass is sand
eeeeeeeee
put it on your tongue
wiggle
there are nothings under the nothing
quarters for teeth
or i am clawing at thin air
what is it
the stuff we need

PAIN KILLERS


i wish drugs lasted forever
if i want
if i am a want monster
wantster
give me numb
buzzy gums
chew me & bubble me
& turn me into a moo machine
a gooey blue plush fuzzy
i don't see words
& yr mouth is moving
away for the holidays
lets ice
i am
forgetting to stay alive
when it is crush
or i am cube
& the whole world on it's side
says rub my tummy
i gotta ache the worst kind
my chest is ouch
i am a fragile moth
or something
i mean pills in my eyes
for days i am swallowing
grow something of my own
i want to be proud of me
too
like a father can be a father
or you see it's just
IDK
life is easy when you're on a river
getting thinner
chasing dinner
w/ a fork & a knife & a bib
& a waggy tongue
this drool
fills pool w/ brain juice
i loose
the battle w/ sky is falling
my heart drops
down between my hips
i shit ships
take quick hits from breathing
take fire down in heaves
i won't bleed
another drippy sun drop
until the cool
or crisp
or whatever you call the wind
it's breazy
i'm sleazy in love w/ my drunk
or sober lug
chug the clean water
off my eyeballs
ride a barrel down my whineyfalls
fuck em all
i am scared/not scared
of what hurts
& feelings
dwell on the past like it matters
like i won't be forever
this weather
what we talk abt in the winter
when you are so color
& i'm in the cellar
it's easy i keep saying
it's so damn dammit
i am feeling
please make it stop

HAPPY COLOR


i am the last to know where i put you
mind my trickery & mine is lumbering
against storm wall of sea birds & foam
mouth i just am a yawn afraid to say oh
my brain is broke in also places like hello
please stand over here behind glass
i see you're in my blindspot it goes on
for several thousand miles in most directions
slightly more north as the earth tilts
to freeze blood in my skull i can feel
nothing move through my forehead &
into me & i go like i am throwing flowers
or all i want is yarn or for christmas i would
read you summer poems in the beer garden &
reply to your face w/ i am afraid of how
glad i am that we are alive at the same time

MANHATTAN

lets play adults
put your hands in the gaps
where my limbs are stretched from the whole
i am broken
again
or in new places
the difference between aging & pain
or embarrassed for my fall apart
i am a smokey forest
shortly after the thunderstorm
there is nowhere to hide from rain
when the sky is clear
but i am still slow burn
put me out
i dare a godless space
from nothing to all this
& back again
on the mountain was safe as anything
before i told you what it meant
to climb outside of me
the wants of good fortune
your hand under my rib
my shaky brain cant undo the day
the sun burns on w/o me
stomped under time
i am late for my perfect life
she moves at a distance
that i cannot see or taste or hear
but behind me are only shadows
reaching for my eyes & tongue & skin
i give them what i can spare
but i am running out of me
i am a shadow
walking endlessly to another morning
she will be there i say 
& is not
so i keep floating on this ocean
looking up at infinity

JET GAS


me is going
to explode for the monday
some beauty says she hates
i guess my hips get
flipped
or around is isa globe
a lot of we do time
i am not a god or a human or a
pissant
do me
flavor of many
i forget smell smell the way she sells
me at the beach
a chronic in my locket
to remind a way to waves
baby babay
sea bay
laday i owe you a smoking above ground
below i am safe under soil
her soul inhaled correct nostril
if i sleep
if the doctor says i need to blow up
but i forgot abt dre
i forgot that this is the end of an idea
cramming regret into a void
because i guess my bad
yes he was the first stoned
he was the first justin
that was justice
saying some space mother fucker loves us
or not me
not my beautiful mad ass
crammed into pants 
golden calf
i juss wanna dance over your neck
make the sun drip
sweaty god walking and talking to other walkers
nobody is your father
nobody found the pearl in his body
pulling the clam cage away
backdoor to the grid
i would not erase myself
to avoid the games of this illusion
i am drunk as hell
i did not have to use my ak
but there is nothing else for me to tell you
bc nobody can judge me
i am a zoom
i am a swoosh
i am thuggish and ruggish
walk me
tell me
look at me standing
say if i see you again
on the edge of nothing
nothing

JET GAS


we are mostly nothing

you think its funny you dont owe me money

remember that a long ago
waters the obesity tree
i do nothing but wash the clean

PIMP JUICE


this is the bottom of my dream
you don't know me
i am a crush a lot
i am the one stomping

i am fly
i am blustery blown leaves
don't forget me
forvvvvvvv
no i am not dead
even though i died
there is me
& infinity

up & down & there they go
the whole life
bubbles from my drowned lungs
bottom of the glass
stones in my

GET A ROPE



GOD I AM A GOD MONSTER
& WOUNDED FUZZY WUZZY
& i am a godless
& i am animal now
running around w/ my hands in the pockets
of Holy Russia
on her mission
to milk color out of globeless eyesockets
i am lost
from the neck down
i am no demi-Buddha
i am no worthless roach
chill about your iceberg identity
we all ice
is errthang
errbody in the Motherland getting tipsy-
turvy i saw you swerve
w/ my life in yr hands
i guess
yr curvy words stabbing new planets
against the blackness of my infinity
i am so angry
about death
i am a shucked gem saver
bauble locker
i am one step slower
than my younger self
i will backpedal
into a sucking sand lagoon
everlasting poem-void
how can i exist
as a fucking star
if i can't write for you
my true words
racket under the exoskelly
of my chestbrain
has never even seen the sun
or i am lacking tanned insides
i lost myself
saying storms over & again
the day is forever
i am breathing
& stopped thinking about oxygen
so many mouths to fill
blind of the color of gasses freezing in the sky
of course i know what outter space is made of
my best friend is a burning demi-god
i choke down precious water
just so i can piss it into the ground
that will cover me
i grow
cherries again & over
a life or what is ahead
a whole new life
the shedding of my one second ago
dead memory of something that was only happy
in moments
where did this come from
why are there baby Buddhas growing out of my ears
my grandma used to bathe me
when i was very little
& then she died of cancer
i remember seeing my dad cry
at her funeral
I AM A VICTIM
god how many passions do i have
to have in one lifetime
like i am so excited
to barely hear your voice down my spine
wring the salty sweat from my marrow sun
core a trillion times hotter
than the surface of my blushed coat
they say you are crazy
why are you say crazy
is this my house w/ the pillowed walls
to protect my brain when i am
SMDH
do not call me the past or the future
call me Tiger
run your fingers through my beard
i have been afraid
of drowning
for a long time now
i was born in the EIGHTIES
but i do not remember the EIGHTIES
i was in an egg
w/ so many small cracks
i could see the rest of the world
in small slivers
silver strands of dying parents head warmth
i could have gone too
so many times
i am a flame inside a greater flame
but only in size
furnace
or the wordburn from my sungod
she dances over me
i can hear the brown grass crackle
from down deep
in my midwest cave
in my job
in my terrible limitations of mortal form
look at my hands dance
from electro zaps
in a cushy sponge of forget its
IDK
what does GOMWYF stand for
what does I LOVE YOU stand for
what does NYC stand for
what does SMOKE EM IF YOU GOTTEM stand for
what does BARACK OBAMA stand for
what does GAR stand for
i am hardly making sense
i am hiding on one or the other side of a mirror
i am sorry i said i hate Mikey
i do not hate Mikey
i mean i am sorry i texted i hate Mikey
i do not hate Mikey
not even when he thinks he can beat Moss & I at FIFA forever
or i don't even remember the beerpong teams
if there were teams
i know
i can't keep going on & over about a single hidden Pearl
tucked away somewhere deep in the world wide web
where is my wife
or why do i have one
or when did the world become a TV show
i don't think anyone is watching
such a small fizzle
cheap firework
newborn infant galaxy bomb
truth bombs
where i relax my throat & wipe the cold sweat off my hands
just humming
some song i made up
about our whole lives in each moment of time
i don't think
i will ever be able to explain
unless i am doing it
just do it
JUST DO IT
& maybe everything ends
& maybe the average human is infinitely beautiful
& every second of our life is equal to a zillion dog lives
lets talk
lets wake up before anything warms
& me
& me & me
& i guess the world would be nicer still
if it was a blasted moon
if i was a busted boy floating for always
in my own wasteland
my sooncorpse growing out of your garden
shy & pink
slathered in the sweet soil of my return
no god
i will want to burn
i will want to be dust on the unused furniture
the voiceless artifacts
of lost time
& money
& everything
slowly cooking in the freezing artic waters
what about that
what about your gorgeous planet
what about the other gases in our air
that we never think are essential
my beard w/ no fingers through it
no running
straight into oblivian
like 16 year old Paul Hanson Clark
jizzing in his pants
because the world is his oyster
or some other sexy
godspray of shimmering nothings
that we can only see
when it is cold as hell
shrinking our baller brains
into unreadable names on rice
i have never put my hands in wet cement
but i am pretty sure
my hands have always been this small
wrapped around my fathers head
who is not yet dead
carrying me around like a giant child
knowing that i will never die ++++++++++++++++++++++++++

DRUNK DRIVER



it's about October & i quit
smoking or i haven't drank
in a few days
i don't even drive drunk
no more
except in my happy thoughts
of immortality smiles through
a rough coat
ugly was-a-boy
i am sober & sitting
or smoked marijuana
this morning while my shower
steamed the room
i don't know why
i would tell you
anything about me
but when i am naked like this
i feel no minutes
& stop wondering
what my death will look like

++++++++++++++++++

SEABAY



what if you could drink
all the color chestnut
me being honest
with with with with
a hold me me
i don't know what i am
wasting my arm strength
on the rest of the world
say follow me
say raspberries
how well do you groundwater
know me
up and up the coast of chimney rock
i am drunk
and trying to talk to you about poetry
you are drunk
and burning holes into my lids
i met you i guess
or i felt the railroad crush my skull
ring my neck
juice my juicy spine
name your town after me
i only say thankyou in German
i can't unhinge my jaw
to swallow a large beast
if that's what you're thinking

++++++++++++++++


GOLDING



rumble into groundwater
icy is yr warm crystalship
tiny hand hold ing ing --- 
scurry in my furry heat up
boily sea n sandy chestheave
i don't think about you all day like i do
when i weave/sleep
yr dreamboat
yr a poembot machining me to sing
i can make a wall to stand behind
w/ the sound of my voice
sea throu beehive honey my
place yr hands on my boy throat
slide up under my beard
what is nesting
w/o you
or what the birds say abt flying
it's nice
plz beak me peck away at the bark
long feather dangling in hair
the smell of sun
all over my
nude talking about
yr stunning
the guns on you
snipe roost in the gravy city
i standing forest
i can smell the skin burn
the slow toast smoke coming
beams i breathe
and explode
as you want me to

++++++++++++


MARS


you walk like a thousand bucks
clacking their horns together and trip
over the Rockies like my voice sends
magnetic waves
surf a poem with your bare ass
i have become fatter since you left
is my body worth more
can i grow my head hair down to dirt
before the sun loves my scalp too much
quit kissing me in the TREE POEMS
you don't know where my cheeks have been
my money walking wiggle
ass in these jeans
i know you know your eyes will never
build a pyramid out of me
the Nile is my spilling
don't even say it's a river
everyone knows
everyone can google it
or when i am going to die
what do the stars think about me today
does this complete stranger know/love me
eight-ball is wrong
or what have i been smoking
eyes cloud
blood cloud
lungs cloud
does flying make me as sick as falling
i just can't be here right now
my sticks in the mud are dried stuck
i mean you strutt like a billion bucks
people get excited when royalty falls in love
people get excited when there is a stampede
you yell STAMPEDE
and everyone stampedes
with buldged eyes
tongues dry
get the fuck out! get the fuck out!
the sky is not blue
water is not blue
only my eyes
when my eyes are clean
lick them
pluck the fly out of my lid
breathe on the glass and rub your shirt in my face
look at this shiny toy
pull the string out of my back
hear me

++++++++++++++


STILL


a friend just texted me asking if i knew anyone
who wanted to buy weed

i am something
please something me

i have never met you and i talked to you
and then i felt bad when i couldn't talk to you

what i want what i want what i want
a slice???????

an unmoved moment where somebody says
are you in love

with someone
the moon

sinking under the current of the Platte R.
sinking in the sand of the dead river

we haven't had an inch of rain
all the grass is dead

when was the last time you thought winter is ok
because i don't see through a vortex

because my skin is untouched
i am lost to the idea of finding anyone

used to think about driving into trees
i have never crashed on purpose

i am afraid of brusies
i am afraid of my blood spilling

my face slid across the sidewalk
one time i dont think i mentioned

your neck wrapped around my neck
my mouth up against your ear

i am telling the story of my empty home
the lost dog or the dead dog or

i miss my dog and i miss my family
before everything blew up

before i got this job in an office
before i grew so tired

i don't drink every day
and i don't want to be pulled down

into the water
with water all around me

i can't swim i am telling you
but my voice sounds like

bubbles
+++++++++++++++

LISTENING TO THE CURE RIGHT NOW


joke about my own death
mentioning how many times i refresh thedeathclock.com
in layman's poems i am gross i am a smokestack
i am going to crumple in on myselfish
my worst worsts
wrist wrenching my hands just throw up
all over a keyboard
i can type i dunno how many words per minute
like i got through the educational system
unscarred
i took a lot of physical education classes
growing up
but who the hell knows
what i put in my body
gall knows gosh knows
but i have chest pains when i don't see her
heard about web MD
they said there is no cure
but i am listening
to the cure
right
now

++++

AND FIFES ON AMBIEN AND HE SAYS YOUR A HACK ALSO
push your foot away from your body
angle the ankles under smoke

i am wofting, i am an avalanche of dead birds
all fluffy and flopping through the air

work your thumbs into the tense part
of your own neck so the muscles ooze

purchase trees the size of trees
and walk around in your magical money forest

you can't just say to the sun
i own you sun, you are mine

because the sun doesn't give a damn
about your money

+++++++++++++++++

WHEN I DRINK WATER

wrote a poem about my throat
things i am stuffing

the filter works
eating cookies after cookies after cookies

i am a monster
i think when i don't love someone

filling their glasses
with eyeballs

who washed all these damn windows
i say, twirling around in my mini mansion

lets all dig a hole to hell
sing well well well well

i've got
kidneys to do the work i refuse to do

i've got
death to get away from you

more like i wrote a poem about greasing it
so i can push large objects with ease

but i haven't even started
to talk

sweet sand blasting
crumbly desert

i had to wrap a towel around the sink faucet
to make the water taste ok

well, well, well, well
i have never drowned before

but i'd like to try it
with an infinitely large glass of ice water

o! throat
o' o' o' o!

hover between my ass hole
and the things i say

forgive me for all the pinecones
i am about to swallow

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HAIR
it's a time thing
it's a
forgive

my energy or my
unease
looks ugly in a photograph
looks like i am leaping out of me

there are ghosts with no
color
they say
they are blind i guess

like a t.v. or some disease
in my eyes
from sitting too close to the ocean
thinking i can hear something so big

+++++++++++++++++

GET Y'R GUN
i want to be in love more than anything
i want to be in space
ships
i want my bones to slow gin
I WAS A JUMP AWAY
for awhile
my atrophy from flying
only
my arms are folded paper birds
i am buying
you an entire nebula
pouring
whisky into small glasses
to look through
shaped out of my chest
i am thinking
so step on my yard
tip toe the eggshells
so stand there
so break nothing but my ribs
with my chest brain pulsing
i can
beat the walls i build
i can
axe the forest i hide my face in
nest open
can i hear my own skull drum drop
my voice ricochets
help me
i am not seeing anything
my vision is going foggy
i have loose pills in my tummy
my god died
one time
stopped on my self lying
it is a cancer
or etched small names into my rice grain
teeth made of sugar
and cocaine
i am sniffing the glue in seams
breaking away from torso
waving red cape
at this charging blind anger
just fear of the changing
the death of my army
my back up plan
to my back up plan was
to shoot myself out of a cannon

+++++++++++++++++

just so you know
i am a boring universe
i am the wind, wind, & the wind blowing
i am inside of myself
i am afraid of everyone
i am in love with storming
i walk away from pain
i am the epitome of dollface
i am the river receding
i am the dirt thirsting
i am the pit of my own pitness
i am watching fireworks
i love driving cars
i am the grass, grass, & the grass growing
i am afraid of the no you
i speak to my hearts health
i am the river flooding
i am the absorbing dirt
i keep quiet in poems
i am going to die
i am the no pain
i will tell you how your glow
makes my chest become a million things
that will never exist

++++++++++++++++++++

beans and motherfuckers
tell the story of how i never
peed the bed
and the purple lightbulb

maybe some early sex dream

the roads are dangerous tonight
so i can use
war slang like in the shit

million-dollar-wound

someone once told me
about roadies blowing cocaine
into stevie nix' ass