15 October 2013

PETE ROSE


ate a scone
drank a latte
not sure how i feel i feel like i ate
a scone and drank a latte
pete rose said he would
"WALK THRU HELL IN A
GASOLINE SUIT
TO PLAY
BASEBALL
AGAIN"
i am listening to bright eyes sing a happyish song
it is cold it is nebraska it is october
people talk abt sky in october
or when its not october they talk abt the sky in october
and idk i think i love nebraska
i think nebraska is all there is and
everything is the movies or a beautiful memory of some world
me as a boy thought existed
i miss ditches and big sky when im away for awhile
my beard is growing back just in time
i think
to myself
and this is the first time in awhile i have had a girlfriend
its going great
i write home to nobody
theres nobody there or what i mean is i have lived in so many places
all over nebraska
some girl said she moved 6 times and it was crazy
i hate moving but i cant stop
i dated a girl once who said she was part gypsy or something
i think she lives in washington
i gave her my gold volvo and she ruined the engine
i only saw her a few times after that
i miss her cat
i dont even know what im saying now
i guess what i mean is i wouldn't walk thru hell in a gasoline suit
to do anything really
my life seems like fall and october skies and smells like burning wood
burning fuel burning pete rose flesh
why baseball even i mean why basebal i mean y bbal base
bllue eyes radio head smart phone
where was i when i first heard a modest mouse song oh i remember
the street in a town i lived in
talking to this guy i havent seen since high school
one time he and i snuck into the art room after school was out for summer
and took all the pottery students left behind
and went out to a cornfield to hit everything with baseball bats
it hurt my hands pretty bad
feeling the vibrations thru the metal bat as it destroyed art
but i am wondering with nearly 30 years under my belt
why am i still
thinking abt
being in love
with my past
or something
im at a movie with my girlfriend and we are holding hands and its clammy and we duck down in our chairs and we kiss and its usesless to follow plots
our bodies are hollow when we dont have guts
and muscles and all that shit
important stuff really
when you think a body is what you need
or a friend or a bison who is your friend or all animals are your friend
ride across the great american desert they say it
is beautiful on the great plains
and it is
 

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