20 March 2013

it's like my hair is tucked into my sweatshirt
it's like i am scarfed
or it was 'whose live blog will be the first to win the national book award'
i remember everything
i scroll down through my existence & feel sharp against guts
if that’s what was there
read all the old texts from 2k11
between me & this girl
it's like two months ago i was in love w/ someone & still am
i feel consistently strange & i am
afraid to tweet how ugly i feel inside of my body sometimes
bc if enough ppl follow me idk
follow me
RT my longing for touch
i am riding my bike home through sleet
biting against my cheeks
& mud is flying up from my tires onto my clothes
i will soon be naked
my beard is wet w/ the ocean
snarly & cute
w/ red dust & makeup from women who kiss my beard
it's in there
& i am obsessed w/ being in there
a quail scamps out of a thicket w/ a dozen small quails in tow
it seems stupid to want to be covered in gold
or stand on olympus
& say i want to win the olympics
i am an artist bc i am in love w/ everything it is possible for me to be in love w/
she lives in virginia but
she should be here
or she should be in the sea
or somewhere that i can be w/ her when she wants me to be

plaster my face on the soundwall of crashing ocean
the force of you saying air against rock
it speaks for nobody & that is the voice i hold
dearest to the heart of oak or pine
these are all things
wood is just what my arms & legs & heart are made of
i am inhaling everything
i am everything
my grin is already on all the granite standing
still over all time
is all time
is all time

why should i build myself a mausoleum
paint my morning face on a wall & surround it w/ 100 feet of bomb proof glass
or 100,000 feet of bomb proof glass
or 100,000,000 million feet of bomb proof glass
don't forget to forget me
my name is sinking in depths of a crushing weight
i am a wave too
i am slowly going the way of my quickness
she too a roaming sea
surf me out into the unknown edge
my hair is dancing
feel every change in my mind
it’s just ask me
to carry you over every puddle
i think everything is okay
talk to people
what's yr job right now?
that’s all i do
but what's yr job
i am just talking to myself
it's magical
it's my trick
my sleeves are full of it

i wrote a poem ages ago
i'd write more poems but they’d just be love poems
& i can’t handle the weight that puts on
lunch is at 3 tho so i can blast my brains w music & drugs for half an hour maybe that will help who knows
wanna hit up the sino w me
i'll front ya a hundo
COME ON TRAV
no i said id front you a hundred dollars
to gamble w/ but then you would owe me a hundred dollars
to be paid back within 10 years
you will give me one hundred dollars?
haha after i lose the hundred dollars
that’s why you win
10 yrs i can handle that
i'll give u $3 a month until it's paid off
nah i can't go dude i have a 10k race in the morning
but i would
sometime
no i only take lump sums of 25$
good to know
what time is this so called 10k
8am
haha
"so called"


laugh out loud
at me existence
we can only chuck dirt clods as a good thing
& fuck & enjoy that too
& give each other our feelings in a way that is not a weapon
but if you have to stab me
just do it
if that is what you have forming a canyon through the desert of yr warm sooncorpse
it's a feeling
needles up my back
my ooze & yr deathwish on my chest
just listen to me
there isn't much else i can say in between my last gurgling gasps

why should i build myself a mausoleum
paint my morning face on a wall & surround it w/ 100 feet of bomb proof glass
or 100,000 feet of bomb proof glass
or 100,000,000 million feet of bomb proof glass
don't forget to forget me
my name is sinking in depths of crushing water
i am a wave too
i am slowly going the way of my quickness
she too a roaming
my heavy chest & gangster trot through the city
it's raining today
it's chilly


maybe i will stay inside all day
maybe i will run in my mind
maybe i will write a poem too
a poem about things i sd i would not write abt
i am thinking abt art
i am thinking abt a girl i am not around much anymore
i am thinking abt the jizz in my body & cleaning
i am washing my socks by themselves in the wash
these are all of my socks
i have 1 million pairs of socks
people say nice socks to me sometimes
but that's not why i wear them




you know michael jordan went to the casino before finals games
bc you are running a race
& i want to stuff my money into my chest
& drive around in my dead gold volvo
singing magnetic fields 69 love songs songs
i need new fire
i need new less me
trav doesn't see the comparison between
michael jordan in his hayday & travis davis in his hayday
i am loaded
i am flush & trying to score drugs
bc it's not like i need them
my brain is just wanting something beyond another championship ring
i am expanding
& it is the scariest thing for a mind to
yeah but he was like having sex with other women and shit. i'm hanging out w/ linds tonight
hahaha
damn you
just sayin'
lol
but on a day later in the spring i'd go w/ you
i haven't been to a casino in a year or two
i'd pry play blackjack
well i just want to go bc i got my tax return and a paycheck today so i'm loaded
you'll lose it all
lose?
jk
you're a winner
i'd rather win money than drink & get depressed
hahahaa
godspeed then
fuck gods
but good luck on your race
i hope you beat everyone
w/ an ass jaw

tell me to share what is already for you
tell me to give away what is free
& standing in pasture
somewhere near where you are from
oh
it's a city
it's a big beauty of crushed stone
 


i think everything is okay
ya its ok
you need the speed of demigods
justin
so do i
it makes no sense does it?
:v
:) :) :) :(
dogg
diggidy dogg
hit that blackjack up for me
i'm bouncing out to pick up my bib # for my race
godspeed
i hope it’s 13
break a leg
today
finished 5th out of 102
damn son gettin paid
it was my highest ranked finish ever in a race
i torched em
i think i got 6 out of 6 in a track race one time
oh yeah?
when was that?
ya it was a longer race that i had never ran before but i was asked to fill in for someone
that was like.... 1999
cool
you know
it's just fun to run
who gives a shit
just run
forrest gump style
 
no that race sucked
because i sprinted out and then got tired and everyone passed me
very embarrassing
i mean this was like one time around a track
i did the same type thing in the empyrean run, i wanted to see how long i could hang with the front runners so i ran w/ them as far as i could
but slowed down, couldn't keep up
but i shoved someone into a tree at one point
so that was hardcore
same thing though
trees deserve our punishment
it’s like jesus on the cross
trees have never done anything for us
they're a real waste
lol ya damn true

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