PORNOGRAPHY

i am more than a mansion of fur
coats your throat w/ walking fingers
like fingers wearing human clothes
your barn door show me
how to mix too strong of a gin and tonic
snake poison
my lungs full of carbon monoxide
and i am pouring polution
in and out of my pores or organs
like skin
this huge leather jacket
this fur
i am a polar bear
quit stealing my ice
quit chilling your clean water
quit fucking up
i wish
i could fly
into space
the first polar bear out of orbit
find my own place
to chill

PORNOGRAPHY


whatsa guy
gotta do
to get pissed i mean
fall off yr own pair of legs
shake yr damn yankee-doodle
put'r there pardon my
slimy paws
i don't have an eye-patch
to put out the sun beams
blastin' outta my Magic Johnson sized
super smile
this is brain candy
or mad when we meds me
sayin' things all twang
syrup is slurped or just tree blood
don't ax me
to murder these ol' saps
hand me a shovel
and i'll help dig a little
you know if you got
dirt on ya
yr already underground

PORNOGAPHY

i am a mutant
hear me rrrrr
or here me predict
my orgasm
my demise in the sun
i am a boiling pot of skin
loose hang
watch my feet become brittle
my legs crumble
i am just
trying to get away
there are things
some people believe in
the great unkown void lordy
my voice is hoarse
my face is horsed
there is a horse head in the bed of my brain
skull me
put my teeth on a curb
i spit when i talk
i talk when i spit
into wind
into the hair of a dog
look at my terrible arms
how they hold on to nothing
as if gold was air
cold and worthless
each held breath
each puff of smoke
blow me
send an angel from heaven
to suck me off
dust the ground pills off of my mirrored face
drain all of my blood
and keep it
in something

BATTER



would remove heavy jewelry weighing me down
in a hurricane
so i get fucked
so i flung
soar through the sky like a dead bird
attactched to a rocket
headed straight for who the fuck cares
you're drooling

stop drooling



stop


drooling

DEAD

look at me
want to get used to
dying baby i can't
the falls apart of life
i want
to feel what death is is
is nothing
a little bit at a time
so
when the time comes
so so dark
it is an old friend
that i stopped talking to
and now
now we have so much
to catch up on

BRAIN MEDS


everyone loves the sun
until you are in a furnace
want to be in a sauna
until the booze leaks me
ashes scatter and breathable
my neurons on my synapse
refract rays of my lost focus

i am sorry i forget
i wish i was a better being
but who i am and how much
sun i get and where i am from

i smoked a cigarette
i smoked another cigarette
i said if i see you again
i should know how to do this

he put pills in my hand
and i swallowed
with ninety-six fluids
of Old Milwaukee

i don't even know where i am blacking out to
nobody knows what is coming
the dark is just everywhere man
the sun dies too

but it's going to get really big
and things or hell or good morning
a million times a million voices chit chat
step off onto a branch to see the ground
call Zack Birdwell

listen to a man sing
write with chalk
NEIL YOUNG IS STILL ALIVE
and walking is easy
i can still use these goddamn feet
legs

i learned how to move fast today
i forget sometimes
there is this time shit
that i just haven't figured out yet

UP IN RESTAURANTS W/ MANDOLINS AND VIOLINS



scared is what a dog is a mirror is for catching
all the dust floaty cloud of smoke i shapes she

a real ball park figure of a

dam in the River
damn the society that requires us to know our own age
i am twenty-eight years
six months twenty-six days sixteen hours thirty-nine minutes
a second
a second
a second

the body of me is a decaying boy
what is in me is only guts
what is on me is a bag of laundry
fat dirty
dying
case


i am just sitting here trying to win
i am just trying not to sin
or sin is what i do
or my mind is a kriss-kross
of firing lasers

do not make sound
especially in space
where you need oxygen
to burn

PORNOGRAPHY



remember what you are told
say you saw the light of gobbily-gook
spurt from cirrus fibratus cumulonimbus

dog walk or job hunt job xtreme
wandering through muck floor clean
the mess of my addict love pump

you fork dig my eyes i scream
like the horse trapped in wood box
a rolly polly dead man like they say

so-and-so is rolling in so-and-so's grave
spinning madly like a pissed off top
Abraham Lincoln is rolling lolling lmao

bleak isn't unemployment or i have no
land to dig ditches in fill my shack w/
fillers mind in gutters all sit in a garage

wait for the day when you're old enough
you have your whole life ahead of you
stuff just makes it harder to fly to the moon
and so on

SANTANA FT. ROB THOMAS



scars on my face under beard over smile
what a boy knows about who his dad is
who the fuck Mona Lisa is i am smiling
through upside down ocean through a
mountain of dead birds through time in
a way that makes you afraid of smiling

you're drunk or i can only assume how
fucked up you are writing me emails ab--
out how insane you are i just ramble i
just try to try to try to lie about what i
am lying about my loving doving my fear
of being a stone in gravel pit crushed

walk me into shoes walk me into clik
clak noises in hallways your face on
a tree knot your face on blueberry
syrup your face tattood on my arm
with a big grin add up my words ab--
out your mouth and swallows oxy

codone or coma or please pause for
a few moments while i believe the
blood in your body is pure water
pure like i mean something that has
never even seen the world like a drip
that some kid stuck his thumb into

http://uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.tumblr.com/post/25665309716/a-recording-i-made-of-the-poem-i-am-sorry-but-this

NARROW

your mouth is foaming
about marry me las Vegas
marry me dull dusty woman
clean up for my clean up
the messy spill of my own
piss and what is the cheapest
beer you have gold as the only
color worth a damn

pigeon me
with your windshield shit
or are we sinning enough
has the moon come to tell me
to turn the lights out
sleep
in the grass
feel growth for once

walk around
hopper
think if i had one leg
keep thinking
until the rest of you
just falls off
or turns to nothing

but your ears
hung by a string around
whats left of that neck

listen to the magma
move beneath
feel the warmth increase
as it comes to find you
as a friend it says
and burns every piece
until you are dust or nothing
or beautiful

call names light finger tips

I WOULDN'T TRUST MYSELF WITH THE KEYS TO MY OWN CAR IF MY CAR WAS A METAPHOR FOR HEAVEN


i would dig a good well
i would dig well
and good
and
i will drink a heck load of liquor
and shovel the sidewalk
all around the block
and i
dont know
but

TREE POEM


AND SOMETIMES YOU ARE BORN W/O LEGS
AND YOU GROW
AND YOU GROW
AND YOU KEEP GROWING
AND WHEN THINGS SCARE YOU
YOU HAVE NOTHING TO DO
BUT KEEP GROWING

DRUNK AT BUILT TO SPILL


what she was she enough, plunge
our necks long into draw
shotgun barrells filled with wild turkey
i split my skull open
with the axe of a good friend
know trees the way i know trees
your shoulders are for climbing
linked to form something like infinity
a bond to unbreakable perfection
maybe, but not because we are liars
or not because death is always,
it's because this is all we need we know
our happiness is a new star ready
to ignite life into any universe we can
create with each other there is no
greater force from one end to forever
and all things that seem fake or forgotten
the trust of catching that we are one
heart put here for no reason other than
survival and the enjoyment of each other

NO MORE NEEDY

fossil me gags on the remembered

am angle and am time dog-paddle

underpressure i swell like a puffer

underpressure i spill all my lung gunk

run along joggers or talk at me to me

about all the expanding a life can do

teach me to keep my hand down my throat

without feel without bleed without nothing

fool myself to grip my breathers rub dirt

into my beating blood pump taste the Nebr—

aska in me when in the shade or the sun

or swimming through a jay magma sky

the quiet void between mountains and

mountains or walking through the mud

to the banks of the Mississippi where i

repeat my repeating of what it means to

have something cut so deep through

the center of your always the way

this river seems to.

*collab w/ Amanda Huckins

I AM SORRY BUT THIS IS THE BEST I CAN DO

makes less sense than skin
a dust jacket for your dust jacket
or a floating device
a puff of air anywhere but your lungs

your ocean swims in
a vat of dull stars
swirling around like drowned ants
maybe something much less
destructive
where i stop mentioning my arm
as a cape
or i start questioning why i can say so little
w/o being insane

walking on walking on walking on the side of
a swamp-boat standing in the thick-shit
where it's hard for your face to smell
the difference between what dies and what isn't yet

then everything was a whimper
big bust of a building earth as a micro
Oklahoma City you might remember
a jet flying as fast as sound and or a future's future
the twinkle you see when you wait for
Semisonic to tell you what to do now

what the real world is or when you want to
title a poem REAL WORLD ROAD RULES
CHALLENGE or something a little more specific
like how hilarious it is that Seattle is still a city
worth any ones shit and not that i know but who
really gives a crap about where you are at

and i am not sorry for you or your broken nose
from watching someone else's someone else's hips
shake like a iphone4 instagram picture
tell me to shutter
tell me to freeze in July
standing where i stand because i can't walk
on these drunk wobbly legs
and learning how to drive again
seems pretty pointless

i used to fantasize about driving a motorcycle
through ditches
and it seems funny that in some places
there aren't ditches
or some places
there are no tornadoes
or some places Kurt Cobain didn't shoot his face off
and the Foo Fighters never made
the music video
Learning to Fly
which is a pretty good video i guess
but it makes you really wonder about alternate realities

like this reality where luck exists or love exists
in a way that makes sense to your average love boat
and this poem becomes something about Kyle
and the way when you read his poem you feel like
he is lifting you out of the swamp

but you wonder what he was doing in the swamp
in the first place
and you try to write a poem back to him
but he moved to Idaho
and that seems like a pretty strange place to go

like the moon
is one way to put it
like if they were going to do a fake moon landing
i would assume it would be shot
in Idaho

and back in 2005 or some other year that Bush
was the president again
there was this homeless man
the way there are always homeless men
and i remember him telling me that he was going
to Idaho to die and it really stuck with me
and i wrote some poem
but the poem really was about Eva
and how this relationship that i valued
was falling apart
but you know
i guess that's OK
when things fall apart sometimes

kind of like a forest fire
i said
i said
i said
sucer pas le poison
ne buvez le poison
vous etes le poison

and laugh for no reason
and drink if you don't have to
and tell death shes a fucker
or tell the sky to breathe you in

there is always a try
and everything was
and green is a color on both sides
how are your eyelashes
they call me giraffe
and lions like to gnaw my spotty neck

WALKING ON WALKING ON WALKING ON

WALKING ON GRASS


my neck breaks a look back
darting eyes with messed mascara
or we stand in rain
for too long w/ garbage bags over us

i like my feet though
the way they pad
fast i am thinking or slow i go
you paint me stupid

like i am a sweaty sun
a lying demi-god
fence jumping green grass
chaser of mile long antlers

look you just made a poem
out of me out of my eyelids
pried open because i can't
get enough of you makes me
a fool i guess

and i learned my lesson maybe
i'm old but this business is still
new to me and maybe lady
i will learn to stay away from

someone so sure they know
how to get whatever they want

i huff your god air under sheets
        i huff god air under

SHADES


lets put on our winter coats
and get shitfaced
walk out
into the snow w/ layers etc.
you can have all warmth
i don't give a damn about the sun
you can have all happiness
all i want
is to know i can survive

i ag gag
i am a angle
i broke
i crums
i crumble
i can't swim underpressure
i drown
i dog paddle
i dig a ditch around my dad's house
i eggy
i forget to floss
i fyfe
i flee from taking chances
i go
i gone
i giddy about you being back in Nebraska
i hang
i hope i didn't act a fool

THE REAL


i will not look for you
in a wilderness

choke on loss of
oxygen or nitrogen or other things

i never think about
like the years that got me here

the whole life ahead of me
and how each choice i make

has a huge impact
on when i am going to stop

being this dude
writing this poem

when all i really want to say
is something else

GONNA NEED AT LEAST 20 MORE YEARS FROM YOU


when i write love
in a poem
i regret it for days
and eventually get rid of it
i hate that
i think it's fucking lame
that i can't say
i love you

I AM IRISH AND OTHER THINGS like i think your'e amazing or i know it's no different than a one in a million saying god damn i'd like to kiss your lips your smile makes empty space ignite or i am saying i could grow old being so into you and foolish or drunk off whatever just a shot is all i look for just a split second where you think maybe this somebody might be a thing a thing. a thing. what love is.

MONEY IS THE BLOOD


and all was an answer or a voice of diety
a calf or any functioning livestock
aliens are building our best buildings
what i mean is
i used to think long hair meant don't care
but i spend half my mornings working
on a mane
what i mean is
Ron Paul can't stop the war machine
what if his name was Tommy Gunn
what if Ron Paul was as bad ass
as Ron Paul fans think Ron Paul is
what i mean is
i don't want to waste my time
like there are hours or days or milliseconds
all these lengths
but really life is a balloon losing air
like it's always a balloon but gradually it becomes smaller
until it is dead

COMING UP WITH A TITLE


i was born with it
will never be another never
you see
or you don't see
anything is word or anything
a big pile of words old as f word
fuck
the meaning
make love to talking a lot
saying i know i know
and i don't know shit
about shit
it grows from stuffing
put gas in your openings
makes it go
or is just a bunch of vibrating
as in a quanitity
of violent shakes
and there is clattering

VANISH


what you expect
the green i see
or glow
the sun isn't dying
you look deliberately
you look like outer space
the way way way
far out
fold arm over
bend neck to fit into gut
the face of the moon is mouthing words
but i don't see moonese
just nod
until he goes away

MANGO SALSA

cover all bases
you can just put worcestershire sauce
on it
rub dirt
up sodium
up mother of jesus into cloud shapes
up yours

the momentum of my wrist bending
i can type arthritis with one finger slowly
i found out
that i am not invincible
i found out
that i won't even know it when i die

a demigod can dig a lake and several
write a poem
about your best friend
when you know oxygen is your best friend
or filtered water
or an open bathroom stall

i would eat eternity as my last meal
or i would write a poem called last meal
i would like a giant milkshake
with a side of happiness
any flavor
perferably made with warm ice cream
not melted
like an electric blanket
keeps toes cozy

i was almsot afraid the other day
but i laughed my way out of it
i was like lol
i was like bursting

when you explode
little bits of your body go everywhere
and you are exploding
every second
it just takes
i dunno
time

MOON OVER DIXIE


you're guessing at memories
you have to pee so bad
there are millions of other things
you could be doing right now

i wrote a poem titled VROOM
but i hid it because it was silly
but it was also very sad almost
not that anyone could tell

i think it's too bad that people die
but i guess it makes sense

i think i am unhealthy
because i have always been
falling apart

you know how there is a sidewalk
made of concrete
but you still
smash your face

it's like that
except every second
and also the time
when it actually happened

i am putting pressure on my own bladder
i am testing my limits

you guess a lot
or think about how you miss your dog
you complain about some poem you wrote
or that's me

in the corner
with a flashlight
drawing pen pictures
of a puppy dog

rip
or i keep tearing up
paper face
it's damp here it's soggy

i never learned to swim
so i know one day i can drown
if i want to
or something

VROOM


hush when you're stung by a bug
put your fist through a wall
i can peel back this banana peel
easier than i remember
it might be a genetic mutation
where this banana peel is easy
to peel compared to normal
difficult bananas and then you
completely forgot about Sting
about how exciting neon colors
look or why blondes have more
fun this crow outfit doesn't look
that fun but i guess it makes
sense

GRAVEL ROAD

just mow the grass
the damn greenside short crop

what we want is a crew cut
we have to lower the blade

the rain is another reason
to dread growth or soak

this is not chirstmas again
this is not xmas again

i am hiding behind a chair
i am losing my mind

everything is a story
that no one is telling

i think i am happy
then i think less

what i am wanting
is just a nothing

i don't want to see
where this is going

there are no trees here
most of the places you go

so stop shading the grass
growing

the way you look at me
makes up for all the death i will know

the grass is growing
the grass is growing

i will never tell  you there is anything better
because i don't know

BLUE JAY

i enjoy beautiful girls on bikes
beautiful girls who ride their bikes fast
beautiful girls who do anything
but fast bike riding makes them seem more
beautiful

there was a blue jay on this bike
and then it flew away
because i walked out
of the apartment

there is wind in my hair
and i am thinking
about how my body is working

i go i go i go
thinking about beautiful
thinking about how fast feels
thinking about millions of dollars

and time travel is real right now
or i said the wrong things because i was drunk
but i meant it
i meant every wrong word

SMDH

why are you still here
smelling what is left of the internet
you
take a pic of these bruises
my leftover laugh lines
need a lift
need to sparkle like broken glass
watching my steps
forget to check twitter
write a poem about made up stuff
like i am feeling
this way because of you
or because these strangers are saying
what i am saying to other strangers
it feels great to be
a retweet
like you like like me
like mikey likes life
like i am killing it
with all these jokes
or does you want to live
and livin'
the way my hair shakes dry
the way i count days from dying
my hand on my hip
my dips
my lovely man lumps
dumping my brain talk
on all these randos that i want to brain talk to
@barackobama

SMDH