dad

i lay on my side for hours,
the way my father would on the living-room floor
while he watched matlock or gunsmoke or
something more grey.
a vessel or maybe a nerve starts twitching
& it bothers me so my toes curl,
i tilt my head to the side where my leaned shoulder
burns.
then my belly sleeps out, a pulling ooze
that buries the differences that were there before
i got older &
he still stays the same.